There are two strategies that monored decks can feasibly produce. The first is balls-out aggro, usually involving a bazillion efficient burn spells (and sometimes Goblins), which mostly folds to cards that say "you gain 5 life" put in a sideboard. The second is balls-out combo, which is almost assuredly Storm combo, which folds to cards red can't interact with, and requires an asston of rituals to make it work.
So, we've got burn spells, rituals, and the occasional Goblin. Not exactly varied. Because of things like this, red has been traditionally the weakest color in most formats, especially Legacy. Aside from things like Lightning Bolt or Helix, it barely makes a showing there. However, Lightning Bolt is really, really good at what it does. It takes some serious heavyset balls to be a spell that people cast in eternal formats.
Which brings us to today's card. What's worse than Lightning Bolt?
Well, yes, but that's still a playable card. 3 damage for 1R isn't embarrassing or anything. Try again.
Well, that's closer. But being strictly worse than Lightning Bolt doesn't mean it's unplayable. Hell, Shock and its cousin show up in tournament decklists every now and then. Let's go deeper.
Hey, we're getting somewhere now. 1 damage for R isn't great. Especially at sorcery speed. But the fact that I can dump all my lands later on to ping someone to death almost makes me want to try and build around this. It still won't be good, but it could potentially be playable. One more chance. Show me something really bad.
Now we're talking! Take a look at that, fellow Spikeans. Let it sink in for a minute. You've got Bolt, then strictly worse Shock, and then this, which is strictly worse than Shock. Shock is barely playable in any competitive setting, and something like Flame Jab is only playable due to the recursion you can get out of it. But this? No recursion, sorcery speed, minimal damage. This is, what we like to call in The Biz, a "Waste of a Deck Slot". This is likely the worst burn spell ever printed, and that's saying something.
 |
| Candidate #2. |
I would be embarrassed to put this in a deck. I would be embarrassed for someone if they put it in a deck, even if it was "for teh lulz". There's nothing to redeem here. Absolutely nothing.
Nothing...
Nothing...
Nothing...
To be fair, Starter.
ReplyDelete(shitty set does not excuse shittier card)
To be fair, mono-red did just win the last Star City Legacy tournament. So red isn't the absolute bottom of the ladder. That is probably green, given that most of the green cards that see play are secretly blue (Tarmogoyf, Natural Order, etc) or giant dudes (Progenitus).
ReplyDeleteThat said, Scorching Spear makes me want to stab my own eyes out with a Needle Drop.
Red is definitely a thing, but it's very underrepresented (read: linear strategy) and weak in comparison to other colors. It doesn't surprise me if/when a burn deck wins something, since it has a dark horse "come out of nowhere" quality to it.
DeleteThe percentage of decks playing red is very, very small, since barely anybody splashes for it (Zoo being the only thing that comes to mind). Everyone and their mother splashes green, even if it is just for Goyf and Krosan Grip.
This is an comment for Embershot on Anycraze:
ReplyDeletePosted By: 120716 on 7/19/2004
Hmmmm. Alan Pollack is a brave man. A little stupid but brave. So what's the good thing about this card?
-It's cost can be used for any effect that requires high costs.
-To decide who's starting, people tend to look at a card in the middle of their libraries.
-When you play this on a mother of runes, people will have sympathy for your efforts and maybe even let it do its damage.
-If you're very lucky maybe you might be able to have a chance of killing a foe somewhere near turn 15
-...
Man, I feel sick. I feel terrible for those poor trees. Wizards should be ashamed of themselves. Having so many trees die for something that ain't even worth touching my ass. Hell no! The injustice. So what do you do when you encounter one?
1. You scream your guts out and run away with your arms in the air crying "get it off me!"
2. You decide never to talk about the incident again, and start a new chapter in your life.
3. You ignore the fact that this is a product of reality.
4. You once loved red, and now feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom and don't even know if you'll ever return.
5. "Think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts,..."
6. You don't deny the fact that Wizard created this card, but state that 50.000 people died in an attack on the WTC Towers years ago.
7. You punch the next person you encounter in the gut.
8. You play the card and risk a beating, but state that with the mana of the spell, 7 Lightning Bolts would mean their doom.
9. You play the card, hand raised like in the picture and say "BURN!". Then you turn away and take a run for it, only returning to take a card from the top of your deck.
10.You can do all of the other things previous entries proposed they're really worth trying. Campfires can be very cosy.
Please, need, moral, support...